Nothing stays the same. Growth requires change. When we stretch, we grow. Stretching can be hard. 

Such a collection of bon mots ought to be nestled in a basket of fortune cookies. But if you’re reading this, then odds are you know all about these truths, because you’re up to your neck in change with the move to your new home. First, let us say, welcome! We’re glad you’re here.

And while change can be exciting, where you traveled from still lives large in your mind. Which is natural because that’s where all your known automatic maps are stored: who your hairstylist was, your favorite place for a cup of coffee, the quickest route to the dentist, and even the layout of your former grocery store. As with any new place, you’re starting from the ground up. So, to help with the transition, we’re offering a few Texas-friendly tips for turning your new zip code into your new hometown.

As the expression goes, when’s the best time to plant a tree? Thirty years ago. When’s the next best time? Today. While you’ve moved away from old friends and haunts, the good news is you’ve built a life up from scratch at least once before. And probably multiple times in your past. You know what works and doesn’t work for you. So take advantage of that knowledge by nosing around and explore what’s out here with an eye for what gives you joy. And while it would be nice if a neighbor comes over and introduces themself to you, be the brave one by taking the first step. Break the ice by saying hello and making your introductions. The more generous you are, the odds are greatly improved that others will be generous back, especially with tips on locations and services that they enjoy around here.

Humans tend to need three spheres in order to feel whole. A home place, a workplace, and a community place. We’re wired for connection, and if we get those needs met, then we’re building the foundation for greater contentment. There are no happy hermits. In trying something new, keep in mind that great ways to meet others are through religious centers, gyms, and community service clubs, such as the local Rotary Club, Lions Club, Kiwanis Club, and Women’s Club. And don’t overlook your hometown library, which may host book clubs and speakers on various local topics. You might be surprised that as you take a risk here and there; within a relatively short amount of time, these strangers may evolve into your new network of friends.

Be gentle with yourself. There are studies on the events that people find most stressful, and on a scale from one to 100, moving tends to land in the top 10. While humans are amazingly adaptive, we’re also not bullet-proof. It may take you a full year to feel as though your new community is really your hometown. Feeling like a stranger in a strange land for the first four seasons isn’t all that unusual. It may be just how long it takes for you to adjust to all the myriad of experiences. But after a while, you may notice an internal shift. You’ve made a few friends, you feel more oriented in your town, and all this current newness has evolved into a deeper relaxation that only comes from being home again.